Andrew Flintoff believed he “shouldn’t be here” and was given a “second chance” at life when he survived a high-speed car crash – but predicts he will have to deal with the physical and psychological effects of it “for the rest of his life”.

Former England all-rounder Flintoff has had a series of operations on his face following an accident while filming a British TV show Top Gear In December 2022. He has rarely spoken publicly since then but is opening up about the accident and its impact on his mental health in the upcoming second season of his BBC show Freddie Flintoff’s Field of Dreams.

“I really shouldn’t be here, with what happened,” Flintoff said in footage to be released next week, taken from his bed in the weeks after the accident. “It’s going to be a long road back and I’m just getting started. I have to look at the positives, right? I’m still here. I’ve got another chance, I have to give it a go. I see it for what it is: a second try.”

Flintoff kept a low public profile in the months following the incident while his injuries healed. The series shows him speaking to close friend and former Lancashire team-mate Kyle Hogg in July 2023. “I thought I could get it over with. I wanted to get it over with and say ‘here I am, I’m fine’ but it didn’t happen, it was a lot harder than I thought it would be,” Flintoff said.

“Even though I wanted to go out and do things, I couldn’t… I wear a full face mask and goggles everywhere I go now. I struggle with anxiety: I have nightmares, I have flashbacks. It’s been very hard to deal with. But I feel like if I don’t do something, I’ll never be able to go out. I have to keep going.”

In the first series Field of dreamsFlintoff and Hogg brought together a diverse group of youngsters in Flintoff’s hometown of Preston and introduced them to cricket, forming a team that played a series of friendlies in 2022. In the second series, they took them on tour to Calcutta – but the trip was postponed for a year due to Flintoff’s accident.

One of the boys, Finn, asked Flintoff if he felt “100%” before the trip. “No, actually,” he replied. “To be honest, I don’t know if I’ll ever feel back… I don’t know what ‘completely better’ is. I’m who I am now. I’m different from who I was before. That’s probably something I’ll have to deal with for the rest of my life. Better? No. Different.”

Following his injuries, Flintoff made a gradual return to cricket in a number of different coaching roles. He worked as an assistant coach with England’s white-ball teams, including at the T20 World Cup in June, and is also head coach of the Northern Superchargers, a men’s Hundred team that won three of its first four matches.

Following the sacking of Matthew Mott as England’s white-ball coach, Flintoff has been touted as an outsider for the job. He was initially brought in as an unpaid consultant to the England squad by the team’s managing director Rob Key, but footage from the series suggests he has been considering a coaching role for some time: “If I apply for the England coaching job, I might not put these on my CV,” he joked as his squad trained in September 2022.

Flintoff has refused to give interviews to independent outlets since his appointment, but did participate in a question-and-answer session with producer Clyde Holcroft during a promotional event. Field of dreamsThe actor, who said that he fell into a “television trap” after his acting career and that after a “perfect introduction” he “wants to do more coaching”, noted the following:

“I’ve always wanted to do something in cricket. I never quite knew what it was,” Flintoff said. “I’ve done commentary in a way that I didn’t particularly enjoy or wasn’t for me. I’ve always had a desire to get into coaching but I’m not sure what path to take or who to coach – or, let’s be honest, who would accept me.”

He explained his ambition as follows: Field of dreams was to change the perception of cricket as a “chic sport” – and he said that was one of the reasons why the Hundred was successful. “It’s not for everyone, the Hundred,” Flintoff said. “But I think it’s done some really good things. You look at the crowds that go and watch it; both on free-to-air (TV) and on Sky.

“In some areas it is still perceived as a glamorous sport, an elitist sport and we need to break that down but I think we are on the right track. We can always do more but I think there has been a definite shift towards it being more popular recently… We have seen how popular it is in India. If you could get 10% of that (in the UK) we would be happy.”

On Freddie Flintoff’s Field of Dreams Tour It will be shown on BBC One and iPlayer on Tuesday 13 August at 9pm